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[personal profile] onceuponajanuary
 I've been noticing that an increasing source of debate around the Interwebs centers around what I find to be an incredibly stupid issue: whether or not to have kids. No, not whether some person in particular should have kids, but whether anyone should ever have kids. This vexes me because the people on both sides of it are, quite frankly, maniacs.

On the one hand, you have the militant childfree sector. These people believe, among other things:
- that having children is inherently stupid (You know, except that it's kind of necessary for the continued survival of the species.)
- that no normal, sane person ever likes children (Which is why people voluntarily keep having them, of course.)
- that no woman would ever have children unless she was pressured to do so by men/society (Well, that certainly explains all the single women and lesbian couples who choose to have kids despite pressure to the contrary...)
- and finally, that children are naturally horrible people. (What, like you were never one?) 

Then on the other side of the equation you have the militant pro-parenting sector, which continues to perpetuate the ideas:
- that having children is the only worthwhile thing you can do with your life (Seriously? Doing something literally every other organism on the planet can do is the pinnacle of human existence?)
- that all normal, sane people love children and those who don't are defective (By the same logic, people who don't like chocolate are also defective.)
- that everyone, including people who don't like or want children, should have to have children (Because being raised by someone who doesn't want you isn't psychologically scarring in the least.)
- and of course, that once you have a child you automatically love that child. (Pay no attention to the number of children that are neglected, abused, or murdered by their parents.)

You know what? You're both idiots. I hate you. Children hate you. Baby Jesus hates you. Stop it.

In the interest of full disclosure: I don't want kids. I don't particularly like them. The best I can do with them is awkwardly pretend that I know what to do with them while praying fervently that their primary caregiver will show up and rescue me soon. And honestly, I dare anyone who has seen me flip the fuck out over some minor slight to look me in the eye and tell me I would make a good mother. I want cats. A boatload of cats. No babies. I'm also (in my own humble opinion) a mentally sound, reasonably successful human being. Anyone who claims that not having kids I don't want and would probably irreparably fuck up somehow limits the overall worth of my life is a douchebag.

But seriously? I don't expect everyone in the entire world to share my viewpoint. First, because that would be stupid and lead to the extinction of the human race, and second, because people are (shockingly) different. Clearly, as evidenced by the fact that the majority of parents love their kids and enjoy spending time with them, parenting is the right choice for at least some people. Some people can't imagine life without children. Who the hell is anyone else to tell someone what they should or should not do with their life? Yes, I get that it's irritating that the world basically expects you to get married and have babies if you don't want to, but the same applies to people who do want kids and are told by the likes of you (because clearly, you know everything) that they are not allowed to do so. Being vilified for your personal choices sucks no matter what those choices are. 

In short: Want kids? Great. Have some, or adopt some. Don't want kids? You don't have to have them or take a job where you have to deal with them. Just don't bitch at people who take the opposite viewpoint, whatever that is. Despite prevailing wisdom, people are allowed to do what they want. Really.
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January 2012

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